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By Luke Kusick

Ever since Executive Order 7248 passed at the beginning of President Obama’s third term, Americans have become accustomed to Thought Police monitoring all of us. Secret abductions, trials where one is guilty until proven innocent and dangerous thoughts such as tax cuts, freedom of speech and the right to bare arms resulting in the execution of people have skyrocketed. In this new glorious Utopia, we have seen that the Thought Police’s tactics of shooting first asking questions later, chokeholds on innocent civilians and execution style shooting has gone rampant and society has generally deemed it good. Local citizen who wished to remain anonymous stated, “I really like the fact that our thoughts are being monitored 24/7 but I feel that the government can be doing better job. We still have incidents where people get offended by certain words and actions of others and I just don’t want to live in a world where anyone is offended ever.”

As we all know, we currently live in a democracy and we all know that the founders wanted freedom of speech only up to the point that no one gets offended. In order to ensure that we do not offend our fellow Americans we must unite and tell the president that the thought police having access to our thoughts 24/7, carrying 30 round, collapsible stock AR-15s and being able to search our houses at any time possible that it isn’t enough. People are still getting offended every day over sayings or words. In the 21st century people are still cursing, will sometimes refer to a transgendered person by the wrong pronoun or even worse sometimes will talk as if liberty is more important than safety.

So what do we need in order to properly allow for America to become a bastion of freedom from being offended? Simple, we need a much more militarized thought police. Lets face it, having one thought police officer per street block is no longer enough. We need as many thought police officers, as there are citizens in this country. But having more officers isn’t enough. We need them to not only be the officer but also the judge. The old bourgeois system of trials is antiquated and does not allow for those who offend and upset their fellow citizens to be properly dealt with quickly and effectively. The thought police now must become both the accusers and the judges of all crimes. This way those who commit a crime will be properly punished right away rather than having to go through the judicial system, a system that merely allows the guilty to hide behind old antiquated ideas such as rights of privacy and protection from the law. With a more militarized thought police we can truly have a greater society.


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