Anthropology: For people that really REALLY want a hard time looking for a career.
Bartle: Great place to pick up printing, Krispy Kreme donuts, and a panic attack.
Cramps: They come for free with your meal plan!
Downtown: Keep it classy by stumbling from corner to corner while your friends call a cab. For extra pizazz, throw up on the sidewalk.
Einstein’s: If you want to eat their bagels at a normal breakfast time, it will be lunch by the time the line dies down.
Fleishman Center: They’ll look over your resume, help you practice interviews, and sponsor helpful career events. No joke here; if anything, the joke is how little they’re utilized.
Geology: Did you know a class with about as much difficulty as your high school earth science class counts for a lab science requirement? You heard it here first.
Hillside: Farther up the hill than Mountainview, so that naming definitely makes sense.
Intramurals: When you’re a college athlete but you “got other stuff going on.”
Jogging: The entire Brain makes a great track for you masochists out there.
Kosher: DID YOU KNOW BINGHAMTON HAS A 30% JEWISH POPULATION and they all live in Newing?
Late Nite: Don’t want to get blasted out of your mind on a Friday or Saturday night? Come make arts and crafts and watch movies!
Mountainview: Leg day every day. The view from Appalachian is our A E S T H E T I C.
Nature Preserve: For when Green Day Fridays just aren’t enough of an opportunity to get your green in. And there’s Wi-Fi!
OCCT: Actually extremely helpful and almost always reliable for getting around town to the three or four places outside of campus that matter.
Pipe Dream: When you want something to call “fake news” but CNN has stopped responding on Twitter.
Quotations: Even after years of doing it, you’ll still worry that you didn’t cite a source properly in a paper.
Review: The only right-leaning publication in the SUNY system, somehow managing to stick around for 30 years, and where you’ll get your REAL Binghamton education.
School of Management: They wear business clothes every day, they’ll have a better job than you after graduation, and no you can’t get in.
Tully’s: HI HOW YA DOIN’?
University Fest: Trick yourself into thinking you’re busier than you actually are after the listserv emails from ten different clubs start piling up.
Vestal: Where Binghamton University is ACTUALLY located, with strip malls and slightly better socioeconomic conditions than the surrounding area.
Weather: That feeling you get after waking up but before having coffee is basically how the sky will look from November to April. And there’s snow most of the time.
Xanax: Yes, it’s the only thing that starts with X related to college, and yes, it’s as helpful as they say it is.
Yik Yak: Do people still even use this?
Zombie Student Association: They’re our Z every year, they’re nerdy but brave, and they have a special place in our EIC’s heart.
Note: Photo credits go to the SUNY blog.