By Rebecca Goldstein
Recently, there’s been a “kink” that has become more widely known as DDLG. This abomination, which stands for “Daddy Dom Little Girl” is essentially pedophilia-lite and is super uncomfortable, abusive, and wildly problematic. Yes, I’m kinkshaming. No, I don’t care. I don’t need to be part of this specific community to speak about it, especially since these people have no problem going out in public as adults in children’s clothes, or going to the park and playing like children around other children. It is absolutely deplorable that they subject outsiders to their kink without their consent, so why should outsiders not be allowed to have an opinion on it?
Essentially what DDLG is is that there’s a man (or a woman; the creepiness of DDLG doesn’t discriminate) who is the “dom” and sort of acts like a father figure in the relationship. They control the “little” and make rules for them, punish them, reward them, etc,. It’s literally like being a parent. They parent their significant other. A brief search on Tumblr shows the toxicity of the culture: the “little” tends to dress in little kid’s clothes like adult-size onesies, they get pacifiers, diapers, and stuffed animals, which they call “stuffies”, and they choose an age to act– one of the most popular is the age range 2-5. They get into what’s called a “little space” where they escape from their real adult lives and act like children– and that’s when their “daddies” or caregivers are most sexually attracted to them and they have intercourse. The little is supposed to follow the notion that “Daddy knows best and is always right” and is essentially not allowed to say no or they’re punished. Do you feel uncomfortable yet? It’s literally grown ass adult people CHOOSING to have sex with other adults that are DRESSED LIKE CHILDREN. Yes, they are two consenting adults, but the concerning part is the fact that an adult has to see a person acting and looking like a child in order to get aroused! Beyond that, it’s literal abuse to not be allowed to say no.
There are various DDLG groups on Facebook and Tumblr featuring some heinous shit: role-play scripts using the term “princess parts” for a female’s vagina, “prince parts” for a penis, and honestly? A lot of the word “no”. These scripts feature the “little” speaking like a damn child, and there’s an obscene amount of spanking. In one of these godforsaken role-plays, the “little” details humping a stuffed animal to her “daddy.” It’s thoroughly concerning that these people refer to their significant others as “mommy” and “daddy.” Even Freud would thoroughly disturbed.
While BDSM and calling your partner “daddy” or something similar during sex is a bit more understandable, there is absolutely no reason and no justification behind acting and dressing like a child in order for sexual gratification. I refer to it as “pedo-lite” because while it’s not technically pedophilia since both parties are consenting adults, it’s damn near it since one of the parties is attempting to portray a child for sexual pleasure.
DDLG is disgusting and deplorable: acting and looking like a child for sexytime is really gross, and while I’m obviously not going to police what’s going on in your bedrooms (as long as you don’t police my midget porn!), if you’re into this: your desires are bad and you should feel bad. Pedophilia is horrendous and this is basically legal pedophilia. It is completely wrong.
Wow. Where to even begin. You have a very skewed understanding of this kink, so let me try to explain.
I’m part of the community. Those of use who are actually healthy practitioners do NOT: have “daddy issues,” flaunt our kink in public (the public can’t consent), or have any interest in pedophilia. That being said, as with ANY kink, you are going to have your creeps, and unfortunately for those of us who are mentally healthy practitioners, our kink’s creeps are the creepiest, which is why we get SO much blatant hate. All other kink lovers LOVE to shame us. Maybe you need to meet some people in the community who are NOT this way? We are interested in emotionally healthy relationships with consenting adults exclusively. If you have met otherwise? These are not part of our kink. They are seriously screwed up individuals.
Think of it like when you meet a “Dom” who does not respect women and just wants an excuse to be able to abuse them. What if that’s all anyone knows of BDSM as a whole? You’d try to correct them and say “They don’t represent what BDSM really is.” Well, the people you describe, to MANY of us….they don’t represent what DDlg and Cgl are. I am part of a community of littles and Bigs who all think this way. We are careful to not flaunt anything in public.
A DDlg or Cgl dynamic is all about emotional nurturing and an emotional outlet for the one entering into “little space.” Simply because you can’t understand why putting on a onesie and having a pacifier and climbing into your Dom’s lap is a relaxing and needed escape from the real world for us, why does that automatically make it weird or creepy?
It’s also not about sexualizing children’s things. When my partner sees a toddler with a onesie and a pacifier, all he sees is a toddler with a onesie and a pacifier. When he sees me in them, he sees his consenting adult partner embracing that emotionally vulnerable part in herself and desires to connect with me in that intensely emotionally vulnerable way that most vanilla or other BDSM couples can’t and/or don’t need. But for people like us, that emotional sensitivity is heightened.
So, you think my kink is disgusting and I should feel bad? I don’t. Your kink shaming and lack of understanding is disgusting and you should feel bad. Yes there are bad people out there. We want no part of them in our community any more than you do.
Also, one of the other main dynamics in BDSM is the master/slave dynamic. By what logic did the author of this article figure out that DDlg is gross and shameful but Master/slave is not? Just as people involved in a M/s dynamic do not support actual slavery and human bondage, so too do those of us in the DDlg community obviously not support pedophilia.
Wow. What a narrow-minded and ignorant article.
Except the fucking space between the two kinks is that one isnt focused on one person imitating a literal child. Say what you want but trying to even compare the two is laughable. Ddlg IS toxic and defo pedophilic. Ddlh doms are all in denial of their pedo ways and ‘littles’ are aroused by the fact that they can finally stop fantasizing themselves as children being sexually abuse and instead experience it throigh roleplay. Your all fucked and you should feel awful for even entertainging the idea enjoying the sexualisation of child abuse.
Shhhhh…your ignorance is showing. We don’t imitate “literal” children. That is literally saying ‘Here is this real life child who I am going to imitate.” We are letting out our inner child. My Daddy Dom is every bit as attracted to me in my adult or “big” space and attire as he is when I’m in my little space and wearing my cute skirts and dresses. I was not abused as a child, I have a master’s degree, I’m in management at the company I work for, I make good money, I own my own home, and am all around a highly capable and well-adjusted, mentally healthy adult. Just so happens that because I’m a highly sensitive empath, it can become exhausting always being boss lady and independent and in charge. My little side allows me a vulnerable space where I can allow myself to be taken care of sometimes. If you don’t understand it, that’s ok. We’re not expecting you to understand it. But if you think it’s sick and depraved, maybe look inward to yourself and your own issues for why you are ONLY able to see it as sick and depraved. This is your personal issue, not ours. And honestly? I couldn’t give a fuck what you think because I know my relationship is healthy and fulfilling.
Totally 100% agree with you! I’m a middle little (kinda) and people assume that I’m a dominant on bed because in real life, I’m a 25yrs old woman with degree and high position at work. I also make good money and I’m an activist in feminist group. But when it comes to pleasure and bed, I have a little space where I can allow myself to be taken care of. My dom partner is 100% support me in my career, my independent life, and everything. We take care of each other and have a healthy relationship. Having a BDSM kink doesn’t mean that he’s a pedophile, he’s still look at me as an adult. I just hate when ignorant people said that this kink is wrong. If they find our kink is weird, all they can do is just shut up and leave.
Your “daddy dom” is sexually attracted to children. If you let him around kids, WHEN they get molested I need you to know that it is your fault & you may as well have told him its okay. Like get therapy please youre literally a broken human.
Hi im a little and to be honest i dont feel any of these feelings you speak on also tomention my partner before he passed from covid and I perfered calling him daddy we both came to ground of understanding before we even started the relationship as all Doms should within any relation to BDSM. I enjoy the feeling of having someone treat me as if i am a treasure worth taking care of. The bond we build through me being in little is one that is strong because there i am at my most vulnerable not physically but mentaly. As an adult the world seems scary but i never really fully endulge in my feelings because as adults we are tought no one gives a dam when you cry. But when i am a little no matter how scared i get i know that either my mommy or daddy will be there to protect me. Love me . And simply remind me that in this cruel cruel world that there is someone that cares and loves me and doesnt give a flying fuck about if me being a little makes me happy.
And btw its called fucking regression and littles are no the only ones to experience it . There is a saying once a man twice a child the older you get the more you conform back to childish ways so please stop being a fucking dick ward jerk.
And my mommy says your an uncultutedd pig who doesnt understand
My girlfriend and I were in a ddlg relationship before I even knew what it was.she always fuses and dad takes control of her and punishes her as I see fit. My girlfriend has called me daddy from early in our relationship which at first I was like alright never been called that but whatever. Eventually now I love it and she doesn’t ever even call me by my real name not even infront of friends of family . Just dad or daddy . She does it because we are old fashioned in male /female roles in the home. I provide and protect her and the kids she does alot of the cooking and stuff like that . So we also have kids from other relationships so she always refers to me as dad or daddy with them . I’m her daddy because she knows she safe with me ,submits to me, she can be bratty though and I think she gets a kink from me punishing her fir being “bad”usually something planned at a later date (ie; pick me up from airport in just lingerie or certain things in the bedroom or a spanking over my knee) It’s a power dynamic that involves lots of trust ,
. I am generally in control but yield power to her sometimes like every night she gets to pick what show we watch in bed and can control me in the bedroom instead of me taking the lead role in bed. All my friends and family find it weird but they don’t understand how we find it very healthy for our relationship .
Ok first of all I’m a little and I’m not one of the women that dress like a child there are what you call teenage littles that only have an attitude like a teenager that’s what I do I don’t do the pacifier or onesie crap that’s for other people my man has known me since a teenager and we are three years apart so it’s not anything pedophilic for us it’s just roleplay for us and we never do it in public we only do it behind closed doors in our home and another thing is I’m a fucking mom to a three month old . So I’m highly not interested in pedophilia ! Neither me or my man are interested in that. We just love each other and like to roleplay the time we met each other when I was 16 and he was 19 there isn’t a damn thing wrong with that
Not all of us in the ddlg community who have this kink takes it into the bedroom though, I’m a little but my boyfriend and I do have a rule we both fully agreed on where I can’t be in the little space we we have sex. It personally weirds me out and makes my bf uncomfortable but for some people it what gets them off, for heavens sake there are people who like pet play but regressing into a human child is wrong what about being into beastiality. Does being into pet play mean you want to have sex with an animal no! So being a little and a caregiver doesn’t mean you are a pedo, I mean for some people like me it was recommended by a therapist to help for me with my family abuse.
I agree completely. I do not engage in sexual activity when regressed. This is the first conversation I had with my partner when we decided to explore this together. DDLG saved my life. I didn’t want to be accountable to only myself anymore. I could, and I had been for many years. But the stress of being accountable only to myself, and feeling like I was letting myself down was too much. I realized what I needed was to feel like someone else was holding me accountable. I can say no to Daddy. I can disobey rules. But these are rules I set myself that he hold me accountable for because I asked him to.
I have nothing against two consenting adults whose kink is age play role play in the bedroom. Just as I have nothing against any other kink people have who are safe, informed, and consenting adults.
Reading through the comments, there’s a lot of representation from the littles in the community. And I find a pretty common theme (one that I know of all too well in my relationship dynamic) – the woman is normally very stable and put together, relied on by many people, and often feels like they don’t have a space to be weak and vulnerable.
THAT is the sexual appeal to the Big… to be ALLOWED to look after, care for, soothe, comfort, and handle the little in all the ways she longs to be handled. Honestly, the clothing isn’t required but the turn on comes from the freedom, not the denial and subjugation, of the little… when a powerful, strong, independent woman wants to give herself over to a man, let him take care of her, and love her enough for her to feel safe enough to let go, it’s a powerful, beautiful thing… and all the ugly the op talks about is, although abhorrently closed minded, understandable because of the way it looks.
The pedo comment is just laughable to me but I don’t represent all in the community. I’m sexualy attracted to women in their 40s ??? late 30 to early 40 is perfect age…. I’m 32… I’ve always been attracted to women older than me.
Hi, sir, I believe you’ve been looking for me.
I’m 45, a professional, currently completing my Ph.D., who happens to be playful, loves kittens and cartoons. I was recently introduced to my inner little girl, who had no idea how exhilarating it was to relinquish control to a strong, protective, dominant daddy in all aspects of my life. It made me the happiest I had been in any relationship. The dynamic motivated me to be a better person. Sadly, the geographical distance and six-hour time zone difference got the best of us. Being new to the DDlg world at 45, I am finding it challenging to find a younger dominant daddy that genuinely understands and values their role in said DDlg relationship.
In all seriousness, where are more men like you? Where is another responsible, respectable Daddy Dom who is also attracted to an older than they are little?
THIS! You are what I call a “true Daddy Dom.” Someone who sees and fully respects all aspects of a little who is also a strong woman. My previous Daddy showed me how wonderful that could be. In reality the dynamic is, in many ways, an illusion, but a beautiful one created and committed to by both parties. The Daddy knows that his little is strong and independent and in most ways doesn’t truly “NEED” him, but her deep desire to relinquish control and allow her softer little side to come out in front of that person is a “need” in and of itself, even though she CAN, technically, survive without it. He isn’t intimidate by her strength or any of her non-feminine qualities (for example, I love woodworking and working on home projects, meaning I have more powertools than most men). And he doesn’t ever patronize her. He trusts her strength, intelligence, and reveres it every bit as much as he adores and cherishes her softer little side. And she shows him respect and allows him to lead because she trusts him. Not because he demands it of her, but because he’s earned her trust completely and implicitly. It’s both parties needing what the other has to offer in beautiful harmony. And certainly, not every Daddy is right for every little and vice versa. But when those two people do form a connection, it’s immensely beautiful because of what both parties bring to the table and desire despite what they “NEED” to survive. And it’s special because both people see each other to a level of intimacy that other people in their life aren’t privy to.
In reality, despite the power dynamic, the dynamic is more egalitarian than any egalitarian vanilla relationship I’ve ever encountered, it’s more emotionally bonding than any vanilla relationship I’ve ever experienced, and while it is, in one sense, an illusion–it’s more REAL than any vanilla relationship I’ve ever known.
I’ve never quite understood why some Doms prefer a natural submissive. I mean, I DO understand it. But I view that type of “Dom” as a weak, insecure man. Because in my opinion, how much more meaningful is it when a woman who doesn’t NEED you CHOOSES to submit and show her most vulnerable side to?
Thank you. This article is so outrageously disgusting and ignorant. I just don’t even know where to begin. Perhaps dive a little deeper into a subject before word vomiting nonsense on the internet.
Jkat I accidentally posted the comment under reply. Actually, I said my opinion and reply was directed toward the writer of the article in disclaimer. I wrote it because the article is wrong and your reply was well written. I also have the flu and was too lazy to catch my mistake. Thanks for sticking up for those who are like us.
I agree with JKat. I am in the most healthy relationship I’ve ever been in since beginning my cal journey. In my relationship we do not sexualize children whatsoeverl. We don’t get dressed up in baby clothes to get turned on. I like to wear pink stuff and color and get taken care of because it’s something that is therapeutic to me. In fact I was traumatized and abused as a child. I was not able to feel comfortable depending on someone. My partner (who is also my caretaker) allows me to experience the care free activities and release of responsibility that I didn’t have as a child this develops trust between us and in myself. For me sex isn’t even a part of our “kink”’(I hate that word) we have an unusual relationship I suppose. I am able to let go of stress and trauma in little space without judgment. Our awesome sex life is a side effect of being in an amazing relationship that’s built on trust and communication. I get to explore the parts of me that crave to be unconditionally loved, cared for and submissive and they get to explore the parts of them that crave to be helpful, dominant and nurturing. Little space is separate from sex. We do have an incredible sex life because we nurture each other’s psychological needs and respect one another in a way that we haven’t experienced in past relationships. The act of taking care of someone can be therapeutic to someone who has been made to feel worthless and being taken care for someone who has had to grow up too fast or was otherwise neglected can also be therapeutic. The fact that we explore these things together and both get enjoyment from this vulnerable state strengthens our relationship and love life overall. I can see how someone who is in a different BDSM relationship where the BDSM takes place almost exclusively during dez could be confused but please understand that for most the Cgl interaction takes place separately from sex. Any overlap is not because of a sexual desire for children but because of the fulfillment and the happiness that the closeness of the relationship has created.
Ddlg/Mdlg/Ddlb/mdlb is NOT pedophillia. Littles/Mommy’s/daddy’s should NOT feel bad. This goes for pet play as well. IF IT IS ALL CONSENTUAL IT IS NOT SOMETHING BAD. The original post made out that littles can’t say no lest they get punished, completely DISREGARDING the existence of safe words. People in the lifestyle should not be ashamed. People who bash the lifestyle despite having MINIMAL KNOWLEDGE OF WHAT THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT should be ashamed. As well as that, they said about stuffies. I know many people WHO ARE VANILLA AF WHO HAVE STUFFIES AND CALL THEM STUFFIES AND PLAY WITH THE STUFFIES SO EVIDENTLY THIS PERSON HAS NO FUCKING CLUE WHAT THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT. The getting punished is concentual too. AT ANY POINT DURING THE PUNISHMENT THE LITTLE CAN SAFEWORD AND THE DOM HAS TO STOP. AT ANY POINT DURING ANY ACTIVITY WHATSOEVER THE LITTLE CAN SAVEWORD. SO THE HATERS CAN TAKE THEIR OPINIONS ABOUT IT BEING NONCONSENTUAL AND SHOVE IT UP THEIR ARSES. DDLG/MDLG/DDLB/MDLB/PETPLAY IS ALL VALID. IT IS ALL CONSENTUAL.
So you shame ageplay but then wait til the bitter end and say “don’t judge me for my midget porn” ? What a complete hypocritical idiot !! If you get off on adults who literally have the STATURE of a child having sex and can reconcile that, why such self righteous indignation towards age play ? You should feel ashamed of how stupid you are. You obvious I securities are clearly from your own unresolved shame. Maybe deep down YOU want to try ageplay but YOU feel ashamed and guilty, so you project that onto others. Get some dam therapy and grow up idiot !!
I’m apart of the DDLG community. I am a Little. My little is age 5. I don’t flaunt it in public. And I actually don’t wear kids or baby clothes. I wear adult 0nsies but I wore those before even discovering my little and that’s not just my little side that likes wearing them. I find them comfortable. I don’t wear diapers. I don’t have pacis. I AM allowed to say no. In fact its not a healthy bdsm relationship if you’re not allowed to. The sub is the one who gives control. It isn’t taken.
And most littles don’t even have a sexual ddlg relationship. Sometimes its honestly their dom just taking care of them. And a daddy Dom isn’t a parental figure that we date. A daddy dom is a softer dom. Its a dom that treats you in the most innocent way possible. They make you feel so special and loved and cared for. Regular doms can be more rough and they are known to be more into humiliation or the more hard-core stuff.
Ddlg is also a way most child abuse survivors like myself heal. It let’s our inner child heal. We aren’t pedophiles. My daddy Dom is very much attracted to me 24/7 I don’t gotta act like a little to turn him on. In fact in little space we cuddle watching Disney movies and eating snacks. Idk where you got your info but its so incredibly wrong
You are my new favorite person
I get the concept of age regression and that it is used puesdo-thereputically outside of sexual contexts so I can understand the psychological side of it for the little. But what is the daddy getting? He’s just getting to take care of AND have sex with someone who is dressed and acting like a child? So why is he turned on by that? It just doesn’t go anywhere except pedophilia. I can understand having some kinda of romantic relationship that involves supporting someone while being is a “younger” state and then still having a healthy sex life unrelated to that potentially. But is she’s dressed up like a toddle or acting like a chil while having sex I just can’t see how that makes sense for anyone involved.
I totally agree.. DD/lg is extremely creepy…disturbing…disgusting…and shameful. Any “daddy dom” to a little should be kept away from actual children. Children shouldn’t be a sexual fetish. And the littles are so disturbing and dysfunctional. Like ew. Grow the fuck up.
You haven’t read a single fucking thing we’ve said. Your continued insistence in spite of everything I’ve attempted to clearly, intelligently and calmly relay is either ignored out of sheer willful ignorance or you’re projecting your own disturbed issues onto us. We are not sexualizing children. This has ABSOLUTELY fucking NOTHING to do with children. Does the Master/slave dynamic have anything to do with slavery? Does the master/pet dynamic have anything to do with sexualizing animals? Maybe, by your logic, we need to keep all those Doms away from cats and dogs.
“Nothing to do with children” they say talking about a kink where you imitate children and sexualize things that only exist for children. You are the reason that little girls cant be little girls anymore without hypersexualization. “Willful ignorance” look if you wanna RP getting molested you do that but please dont act like anyone but you is morally broken. You don’t deserve acceptance, love, or understanding. You do however deserve prison & to be on a registry. Youre throwing little kids under the bus for male validation(or even worse; because you think their innocence is a turn on) & its genuinly evil & pathetic.
You are unbelievably ignorant. What I do consensually within the privacy of my own relationship has absolutely nothing to do with sexualizing children. Grow the fuck up. I’m sorry you have zero ability for dialectical thinking, but just because this is my relationship dynamic has absolutely nothing to do with real children. We’re not glorifying the sexualization of children, we’re not supporting or glorifying actual pedophiles. We HATE pedophelia and find every bit as abhorrent and disgusting and horrific as you. But my consensual adult relationship that is not flaunted in public has nothing to do with that and if you think it does, 1. You don’t understand what actual DDlg relationships are supposed to be and 2. It seems like this is a huge pain point for you. Either type someone you know was a victim of a pedophile and for that I’m sorry but that 100% has nothing to do with our relationships. Im sorry you can’t see that and I’m sorry you’re just trolling around looking for people to hate. THAT is your problem. Not ours.
The Binghamton Review: the Last Refuge for Scholars: except in this case. If you thoroughly researched in a scholarly fashion, you’d know all the facts that have been laid upon your doorstep. It’s been several years now since you wrote this, and perhaps you have gained insight and wisdom in those years. One can only hope. If you have gained further knowledge and understanding of that which you had only a smattering before, I applaud you.
If you have not gained said wisdom and insight and chosen to remain in your ignorance and bigotry, then I have just 3 words for you: Lady, get bent!
just wanted to drop in and say age regression and age play are two different things, age play being a kink and age regression being a coping mechanism/therapy technique. little space isnt supposed to be sexual in any way or form
I disagree. This couldn’t be more wrong. Age regression is therapeutic for many. Age play is role playing but for those of us who are “littles” being that our little side is a part of our personality and not an escape or therapy from past trauma, little space can absolutely be sexual. Just because we are not the same with our littleness doesn’t mean there’s only one way. I have no Daddy issues. My dad, though sometimes irritating, is an amazing man who was present through my entire life and with whom I share a great relationship. My littleness is simply part of my personality. It’s a great escape from the demands of adult responsibilities and it’s about allowing my otherwise strong, independent, intelligent, successful adult self a path to be fully vulnerable and open with my partner.
You fear things that you don’t understand. That mentality is the kind that used to burn scientists as witches. Do better as a human being. These people are hurting no one and I’m gonna play devils advocate here… Let’s just suppose you’re right let’s just suppose that it is a regress desire by the daddy Dom; even if that were true, this would be an outlet that would keep a real thing from happening
Kind of like people that have too much anger or hormones go to the gym to let it out so that they have control in public
The problem with thinking that way is… That it’s just not the case. It shows lack of understanding so the entire concept is flawed from the get-go.
Anyone engaged in any of the BDSM activities at any genre is doing it as consenting adults. They are not hurting you or anyone else and yet you sit there full of anger and hatred. I don’t wonder what is wrong with people in the community. I do, however wonder what is fundamentally wrong with you.
TW: mentions of mental illness
Can I ask what’s wrong with daddy issues in this case? (I am new and just want to understand). I definitely agree with everything you said DDLG can actually be very healthy and helpful. I was mentally ill (depression, anxiety, eating disorder) when I got together with my daddy. Through all this he supports me and is making sure I don’t hurt myself, eat enough and always have someone to talk to. In this way, yes, he does know what’s good/best for me, he follows the advice from my doctors and is doing his best to help me become a “normal” person. That does, however, not mean I am not allowed to question his decisions and opinions. If I don’t want to do something or if we don’t agree on something I am entitled to have my own opinion and do things my own way. He in no way makes sexual advances toward me when I am in little space as he knows I can be very sensitive and wants me to feel safe. Eventhough I am the little/sub I have the ultimate say in if we do or don’t have sex. Littles, who have proper CGs (not wannabe CG abusers) are nurtured and taken care of in the relationship. It’s about helping us grow and feel safe and comfortable which does not in any way need to be inherently sexual. The main goal of my daddy is for me to be happy, he helped me to get through the darkest times of my life using both littlespace and constructive adult conversations.
With the playing on playgrounds/around children part even vanilla people do that. Especially young adults (teens to mid 20s), surprisingly a lot. It’s nothing kink related or sexual and it’s usually at times when children aren’t there (afternoon, night). We just want to fool around and have fun with friends, so many playground are even build with adults in mind (usually on beaches and popular hangout spots). I definitely condemn being sexual around children and anything that has to do with it, but just wearing a pink puffy dress and swinging on a swing with friends/s.o. is perfectly OK.
“Dressung like a child…” OK and? If you mean onesies and pacifiers, not all luttles use that and I have never heard of anyone wearing that in public (openly, some may wear it under clothes). If you mean wearing fink puffy dresses, ruffled shorts or backpacks that look like stuffed animals – look basically into any young adult fashion store and you will find that. For example: dollskill, koifootwear, bershka… even high end brands have “child like” looks on the catwalk. It’s fashion. Fashion us to make us feel good and let us express ourselves. You don’t have to be a little to wear a pink dress, some people juts like how it looks.
If your research is strictly from Tumblr and other social media posts, it’s definitely not complete. These posts show mainly fantasy scenarios, simplified, without the background and without showing the actual complexity. Not to article-shame but I am article-shaming
Yes I am ashamed of myself at the number of mistypes I did
Your not mentally healthy and nobody is going to feel bad for calling out pedo behavior.
And no one is going to feel guilty for calling out your ignorance, prejudice, and clear lack of intelligence or intellectual, critical thinking. Pedophiles are attracted to ACTUAL children. Daddy Doms are not. If you can’t differentiate between the two, you’re clearly an idiot incapable of any higher level thought.
Not a part of this kink community but your view is jaded. I’d do some soul searching and retrospection next time before you come at individuals living their own lives.
“Im not a pedophile! Im just attracted to the way kids look and act and the things they do & i cant get off unless Im RPing a moleststion fantasy! But dont worry, I’m not actually touching kids so its not the same!!” Youre the lowest form of human and kids are not safe around you.
It is YOU who is equating this with pedophelia, not us. You’re the disgusting one. Not us. Just because you don’t understand something doesn’t make it inherently wrong. It’s just means you’re not mentally or emotionally mature enough to be able to understand and accept seemingly paradoxical or dialectical thinking.
You literally just proved their point. It’s absolutely horrific, an abomination, and overall just plain disgusting. You are NOT A CHILD. You’re an adult and you need to act like it. Everyone goes through “trauma” at least once in their life. It’s time to stop making excuses and grow up. You are so incredibly naïve. Get out of your delusional headspace and realize that this is all just nasty and pedophilic.
It’s sad that you’ve so deeply bought into this idea of how you “should” act, even though you are likely so deeply dissatisfied that you have to lash out at others because we are living our authentic selves. People who are secure and happy and have dealt with their own trauma don’t seek out individuals on the internet to berate and belittle and call names and tell them how disgusting they are. I literally don’t care what you think of me and my EXTREMELY consensual relationship. And if you were to meet me on the street you’d have no clue I am this way, because I don’t flaunt it in public. And because my vanilla life is every bit as important and valid as is my little side. And likely more successful than your own. But we are not punching bags for your own self loathing.
how do all adults behave?
Wow what cunt
Thank you. I came here to comment that the blog itself is far more creepy and pedophilic than DD/lg ever is. It’s…the grossest most inaccurate I’ve seen to date, and that’s saying a lot. Tell me you don’t know a damn thing about this topic without actually saying it. This description is some satanic panic progression….lol
You have a skewd understanding of existence. The fact that you just attempted to explain it says it all. You’re asking someone to be an incestuous pedophile. You should serve 75 years minimum for this alone.
It should further be noted that we aren’t just given random rules based on our Daddy Dom’s whims that are all about him. If so? That’s an abusive relationship. Cgl relationships are about emotional nurturing and emotional well-being. If you see otherwise? It’s
1. We make rules together. Based on my personal goals. It’s accountability, simple as that. Because most “littles” are the type of people who would rather lounge around watching Netflix in our spare time sometimes than go work out. Certain things we find it hard to push ourselves.
2. Our Doms, just like any good Dom, are concerned for our well-being. Any rule that HE might propose to us (we always have veto power) comes out of a desire for our own well-being rather than his own selfish desires.
Author obviously didn’t care enough to do any meaningful research, too excited about discovering a group of people it’s still safe to be nasty and evil to in a world where it’s no longer acceptable to be hateful to people for the color of their skin, religious principles. Sexual preferences are the final frontier of discrimination, and gays and trans are pretty safe now as well, so people like you are scrambling to find someone, anyone, you can still hate openly. Enjoy it while it lasts.
This article is so full of misrepresentations and even blatant lies designed to paint the scene in the most negative light possible. For example, there are a HUGE number of DDlg’ers who practice 100% nonsexually. They are pure caregivers for their little and no sex ever occurs at all. And the little isn’t allowed to say “no”? Total BS.
You talk about saying it’s “practically” pedophilia but that’s complete nonsense too. So you are saying that consenting adults who behave immaturely are “practically” children? What does that even mean?
Even if some sexual practitioners are so-called pedophiles, that’s still only an argument for why this is GOOD.
They have a healthy, consensual, ADULT outlet for something they were BORN with and can’t do anything about, and they have found adult girls (and boys) who SHARE that same desire. Who accept them in spite of being born with something almost every one else hates them for.
Go ahead and shame people like that, repress them, stop them from finding healthy adult loving relationships, and watch as REAL children get molested or worse. Countries with puritanical repressive ethics like yours are the ones with the highest rates of rape and abuse in the world, so if you really cared about people or society you wouldn’t be writing this article.
The truth is, you are just a hypocrite who gets off on judging people.
Shame on you.
Ok, honey, let’s not compare people not wanting to see your kink in public to homophobia and racism. POC and LGBT have literally faced centuries of systematic oppression, and may still face discrimination today, though at a much smaller scale. You’re not oppressed for being kinky. You’re not being discriminated against for people not wanting to see your sex life in public. Isn’t the whole point of DDLG (which is a subset of BDSM) to make sure all parties are consenting, and that everyone in your scene is consenting? How do you think victims of pedophilia and CSA survivors feel about people turning their childhood trauma into some fetish? And why do you get so defensive when people call you out on it? For a community that prides itself on being 18+ only, you sure have no problem letting “underaged littles” participate in kink. People who regress non-sexually (age regressors) are tired of being lumped in with DDLG; people who are neurodivergent and “stim” to cope are tired of other people seeing their habits as fetish fodder. By participating in DDLG, you’re indirectly contributing to the hypersexualization of underaged girls and boys, and allowing pedophiles to be more open about their sick kicks (ever heard of the term “MAP” before?). I’m tired of seeing so many young children being hurt by a kink that’s essentially sugarcoated pedophilia. I know you’ll probably just call me a “kinkshamer” for being concerned about the welfare of children, but I just needed to get this off my chest.
Well since no one’s having sex with children and anyone in the community finds pedophiles deplorable then I think you’re wrong. Pedophiles are awful but this “kink” is literally therapy method developed in the early 1800s for people who went through childhood trauma. Many members do not even partake in sexual acts. Most people also dont go outside and announce to everyone they’re ddlg and are now going to have sex in public. That’s so dumb. I know many people who are ddlg but they go out in public in normal clothes. This “kink” is really about being taken care of and having a way to cope with any trauma. Also doesn’t every kids store already hypersexualise children by only selling clothes that are extremely short and skimpy. I was doing a research paper on how kids sections look more like adult women sections. I’ve seen several stores selling crop tops and booty shorts for little kids.
This is something a libtard would say. Checkmate yet again libtard.
Dude…even the comments are submitting. Does that make you a libtard?
They legit announce it on freaking social media and it’s just disgusting. Nobody wants to see that crap in public or anywhere. keep it to yourself so we don’t have to see those disgusting things. Also, grow up.
I think it’s really disrespectful to say that your basically being discriminated against. People aren’t trying to shoot, beat, and kill you just because you exist. You have people in/outside of your community who stand up for you.
well I think it’s really disrespectful to look at something like this and RATHER THAN JUST GETTING ON AND IGNORING IT PEOPLE THINK THEY ARE OK TO JUST SPREAD HATE ABOUT IT SHEN THEY KNOW SHAG ALL ABOUT IT.
While I get where you’re coming from and agree with most of what you said, I do agree that it shouldn’t be compared to racism or homophobia/transphobia/etc. I have been treated differently, insulted, and shunned for my orientations, gender identity, and skin color. I’m not allowed to dress as the gender I feel, be open about my relationship, or be open about my sexuality. People lock their cars, follow me around stores/malls, treat me like I’m incompetent, and isolate me. People use the n-slur and the f-slur all the time towards me or around me, even people close to me that I constantly remind not to use them around me. (I’m not telling you what you can’t say, I just prefer if words like that aren’t used around me). My neighbor has almost gotten us in trouble multiple times because he provokes my parents and ignores our requests simply because we’re the only black family in the neighborhood. I hate that people will shame me for being a little, especially as a victim of molestation at a young age. It makes me feel safe, and being childish and reliant is just me as a person, so I can feel comfortable being myself. We do not sexualize minors, I am a minor myself and I detest the sexualization of minors, and anyone who does not wish to be sexualized. It really is unfair that people think of us like this, but please don’t compare to the struggles of people with different racial/ethnic backgrounds and people who don’t identify as straight or cis. We get threatened, killed, attacked, berated, criticized, locked away, shunned, abandoned, etc.
I say this only so that you understand where we’re coming from when we say not to compare littlespace to these things. Thank you for standing up for us littles.
Sincerely,
A 16 year old, transmasc, demi-panromantic, and demi-pansexual, African American, little.
If this author had actually done any research at all into DDLG they would KNOW that it was began in the 1800s by Sigmond Freud to assist adults with PTSD caused during childhood. I have done the research and that’s how I know. As for the pedofile crap…it’s just that…crap. ALL those involved with DDLG REPORT THESE PEOPLE TO THE POLICE. We do NOT condone anything such as that and I for one am a VICTIM of a pedofile. For me personally DDLG is a coping mechinism I require to be able to handle situations that trigger my multiple anxiety/panic disorder as well as my complex ptsd. In fact, the majority of Littles I have spoken to over the years also deal with anxiety.
Author, let me ask you this, do you chew on a pen or your nails when you’re nervous? If so, guess what…THAT is what a Little does. Do you cuddle with a stuffy? Yup…Littles do that. Do you tell others what to do? Hmm…Mommies and Daddies do that in DDLG too. Maybe you should think about your discrimination because there are actually laws that state your b***s*** is illegal. Get over it.
By the way, I’m a mother of 3 AND a little and NO ONE has a problem with me playing in the playground among the children. Next thing you’ll b**** about is me being a little with a child with autism. Watch. It’s coming next.
I would like to begin by saying that I think this is not only incredibly immature but also highly unprofessional. I think that the author of this should be, not only disappointed in themselves but also disgusted at their own behaviour and much less ours. I sincerely hope that next time the author of this horrific article applies for a job, that is pops up and their possible future employer sees the terrible, discriminatory and uneducated bullshit that this person is okay with publishing. Especially if this person works in the writing or media industry because i think that it perfectly displays how much they prioritise research, unbiased arguments and informative content. I am, of course, being sarcastic. I agree with most of the other comments, this is disgustingly misinformative, biased and discriminatory, not only that but it is badly researched (if at all) and if I’m completely honest, boarders on fearmongering. As a little myself as well as a partisipant in multiple other kink communities, I really hope that you find a way to make your life better and more educated because it scares me to think that, if I didn’t have my daddy, I could have possibly turned out like you.
I am apart of the DDLG community has to disagree with what you’re saying. Yes I am be biased cause I’m part of the community but with most ddlg relationship you do NOT have sex while in little space because a little doesn’t what that. I’m part of DDLG cause it’s a chance to escape and relax. I suffer from depression and before I even know what little space was I was already slipping into little space. And from personal experience I don’t flaunt it in public or even do it in public because I know people are uncomfortable with it. And you’re untitled to your opinion, you don’t have to like it. You can find it weird and unnatural but don’t go making false accusations about doms being pedos it can make Ddlg people feel ashamed and think being apart of it wrong. Which it’s not. Everyone has a kink and no one EVER should kink shame. Just get on with your life and we’ll got on with ours. And you just contradicted you self it wrong to call Dom’s daddy/mummy unless it in the bed room??? Also DDLG like BDSM is very heavy on consent if a Dom says to do something the little is uncomfortable with they can say no and the dom can’t make them do it. It’s like how in Bdsm they have safe words. (And it’s not just about SEX!!!!)
Hahahahahahahaha
So many wrong notions and false very closed mindedness in one article it’s almost too funny.
Learn. Educate yourself xD
“Attracted sexually in little space”
“Can’t say no”
You’re crazy!!!!
Some people use this for therapy to overcome trauma, some crave a safe place to simply cope with stressors. Others just like having fun and not conforming to society. Where the Fuck does kids come into this?
The outfit? What about loli fashion? Before you think of the book, I’m referring to Japanese street fashion.
What about kawaii trends?
Pacifiers are used by those also finding alternatives to say, tobacco.
Diapers..well, no ones forcing one on you so why are you so violated by something so none of your concern?
“Yes. I’m kinkshaming” he proudly says, realizing in twenty years how that one line, defined what kind of person he was in the community.
It haunts him to this very day.
If you see pedo shit report it!
But don’t write something you’re completely misinformed about…it didn’t even bother to research on. This thing will be on the internet for as long as the site keeps it on. You’re initializing your immature and unprofessional ass. I know littles more mature than this ploy. XD
Ok libtard it is a girl writer. Get your facts and logic right. I bet your husband’s kids must be so disappointed in you. You are such a libtard.
Can you just be a mature adult and try talking with people instead of just calling them names? You’re acting like a child. How ironic.
Why must you insult people? No facts just spouting vitriol. How original. If you don’t have any factual information to say then I suggest you leave. None of us in the community actually care about whether the OP is male or female, we care purely about the fact that they are clearly ignorant and they have been very misinformed about our lifestyle.
So I have a question regarding the diaper thing. I am a very open minded person and am talking to someone who is a little and who apparently wears diapers. I want to support her as best I can but I haven’t the nerve to ask her the following question.
Do those who wear diapers soil them and expect to be changed/cleaned? If so I will likely draw the line there because it seems like this goes beyond the therapeutic nature of ddlg and strays into the territory of mental instability. Please correct me if I’m wrong but I don’t understand.
“Mental Instability” seems a pretty harsh judgment instead of just admitting you don’t understand something. Not all littles are diaper lovers, not all DLs soil their diapers, and none of them are interested in forcing their partner to do something that they’re not into or on board with. So drop the judgment and just talk to HER about it. If you’re interested in this lifestyle (it will never work if you’re not and are only interested in her) you’re going to have to get better at completely open and honest communication.
Seriously, grown ass adults thinking that wearing little clothes and play acting as a child is disgusting. Even more when they engage in a sexual behaviour with their “daddies” . If this isn’t about incest/pedophilia, then why the f do you use words like little girl and daddy? Watching cartoons and colouring relaxes you? Giving up control to another person so you don’t have to take stress helps you? You aren’t an adult if you’re regressing mentally. You are sick and need help and healthy ways to cope, I don’t even want to specify how creepy i find this whole thing. Have people lost all rationality? DO YOU NOT SEE HOW BLOODY CREEPY THIS SHIT IT? I don’t care if it’s consensual you mfs. This shit is nastier than SCAT fetish and THAT SHIT NASTYYY. How can a grown ass healthy adult actually get it up when a grown ass woman acts like a child? I’d say RUN FAR AWAY from gateway pedophiles like that. The worst is that these ddlg types are literally preying on younger kids online, thinking it’s ok to expose them to such kinks. EW.
For fucks sake it NOT PEDO dumb ass and what about pet/slave (I’m not kink shaming) so that’s ok but ddlg isn’t fucking retard think before you brainlessly type
It’s because of the mindset when a little age regresses. Plus,not all DDLG/MDLG/ DDLB/ DDLG are sexual, as little space is a way to let go of the worries of the day (age regression helps with stress). There are many SFW relationships that the little dosn’t have sex with their mommy/ daddy (at least not in headspace).
So what’s your kink?
Kink shaming?
So you get off on that?
I need answer.
This is intelligent stuff.
Dobby wants a sock.
i think she said midget porn. like as if what she watches relates to this community. we could roast her all day about it but this community isn’t as 1 minded and narrow as some over the outsiders in this world. i do hope she has a wonderful life because its easier to kill hate with kindness. (now if i ever saw her doing this shit irl id kill her, but thats me, NOT THE COMMUNITY)
It’s actually recommended by THERAPISTS (first discovered by SIGMOND FREUD in the 1800s) so it’s been around longer than you were born my dear. I really don’t understand how you’ve been told by MULTIPLE PEOPLE how it’s not pedophilia yet you’re STILL CHOOSING TO BE IGNORANT. Grow tf up and accept the fact that not everyone is boring and vanilla like you. I bet your husband is doing such a great job, I think you need to get those knots out your back or maybe experience an orgasmwith a blindfold on once in your life, its very relaxing and it might open your eyes up a little. It is only pedophilia when it is an ACTUAL CHILD. We, as adults, can tell the difference when it’s a child and when it’s not. I think you need to actually open your mind because it’s clearly as closed as your closet.
Never seen such an accurate explanation. I really struggle to be emotionally vulnerable and assert my needs and wants, and my husband loves when I’m able to actually do that and be open with him. I need to be vulnerable, and he needs to know that i do actually need him, and I’m not as strong or independent as I pretend to be most of the time.
please dont do ddlg its dangerous and you shouldnt need to be vulnerable or dependant on someone thats dangerous
LMAO! Get outta here. 1. Being vulnerable with someone is the EPITOMY of a healthy relationship, and 2. In a HEALTHY ddlg relationship you are not DEPENDENT on the other person.
It’s only dangerous if the dominant is a terrible person looking to abuse their submissive (little). It”s similar to BDSM relationships (sometimes trhe dom just wants a sub to abuse). Little space is pretty safe.
The hight of intelligent and enlightened responses, right here.
The government should stay out of people’s private lives. Rebecca Goldstein has completely and intentionally mischaracterized Ageplay as some kind of sexual deviancy. What clothes people wear and what they choose to do in the privacy of their own home is no business of Rebecca Goldstein, the government or the prying eyes of the media. Lots of leftist trolls here looking for someone new to hate. Report pedo shit to the police, leave people’s private lives private. It’s been proven time and time again that the people who cause the biggest noise are the ones with something to hide.
As someone who was part of the community for a while, I can confirm that ddlg is t some cute fun kink community but in fact is a way to hide grooming and abuse. No one can change my mind. I wake up everyday trying to kill the little in my head because all she does is scream for that abusive fuck who was my “dom” the person who mind fucked me so hard that when I met him the thought of ddlg made me gag and within a year I as completely subservient and doing whatever he said.
Ddlg is abuse. It perpetuates child abuse and is literal abuse. The mind fuck of it all is not a “kink” it’s just abuse.
Just because you had one abusive experience doesn’t make ALL of our experiences abuse? It’d be like saying that all men are abusive because you happened to date one low life who was abusive, but that’s certainly not true. If you were practicing any other form of BDSM would you come down on it as hard? Are there abusive POS men out there who masquerade as Daddies and Doms? Absolutely. There are shitty people everywhere. And I’m sorry your experience was bad, but that doesn’t automatically make ALL of our experiences bad and it certainly doesn’t automatically make the lifestyle either. That is extremely poor logic and critical thinking to assume so.
That was a shitty thing to say.
I can get where you’re coming from, but its not true. One abusive relationship isn’t the majority, is it? So, if you don’t mind me saying, don’t say that it is, because that genuinely is abuse against yourself because you are part of it. And that asshole that you dated wasn’t into ddlg, he was using that to mask his pedophilia because a lot of people think that pedophilia and ddlg are the same thing, therefore, he thought he could get off to it, but when he realized he couldn’t, he forced you to act the way he wanted you to act. I’ve been severely mentally, verbally, and emotionally abused by family, and trust me, I know how hard it is to let it go and start over on a clean slate, but you’ll eventually see that he twisted you into thinking that and that none of it is true. The vast majority of people that are into ddlg and are in a non-abusive relationship are always consenting, you didn’t have a choice. Sugar, one experience doesn’t dictate how all of it is. And like I said, I get where you are coming from, because for 7 years of my childhood, I thought it was normal to grow up having to go to your grandma’s house every other Friday and her telling you how you’re nothing, worthless, and severely over weight. Don’t kill off that side of you just because of some jackass, learn to embrace it and understand it, honey.
You’re not respecting what she said. Her experience is painful for her. Listen to that.
We respect her experience, just not her saying that “my experience was bad (and not authentic ddlg) ergo ALL ddlg relationships are bad. SHE is not speaking only about her own experience. She is trying to speak for all of us. We are allowed to draw the distinction between the two, and both myself AND Daddy’s Little Kitten expressed our sympathies over her experience. But that doesn’t give her carte blanche to speak for the rest of us. All we did was kindly point that out.
Honestly, I don’t believe she is a little. It seems as though she was persuaded into what she believed to be our lifestyle by this abuser. It doesn’t seem as though she likely ever connected with the littleness the way we have. And that’s fine! Not every woman is a little. I just hate how she now feels she has to tell the rest of us how wrong our relationships are…
is there a dom mommy/little boy kink?
and would that be dangerous?
MDLB is part of the same community so yes there is. No it isn’t dangerous killthelittleinmyhead unfortunately had an abusive Dom. Which can happen in any dom/sub relationship not just the age play community of bdsm. If you choose to get a dom screen them VERY carefully and at the first sing of ANY abuse GET OUT. age play is really about giving up control and allowing yourself to be vulnerable in front of someone else you trust.
Fuck I hate people who kink shame you can have your own opinion but don’t go around saying it to the world like keep those kind of thoughts and opinions to your fucking self
Cause you neeeveer see other kinks out in public………
Right from the start your opinion becomes negligible due to your hypocrisy
This article is so wrong and not at all what the community is, it’s actually pretty hilarious.
As someone who is part of the ddlg community I find this article laughable. I’m still giggling at how biased, unresearched, and just plain moronic it is. I will concede the point that there are bad eggs in the community, however the same can be said for anything out there. Just because you have an opinion doesn’t mean you should give voice to it.
Personally I enjoy being a little. It has helped build my self-confidence. Getting praised for staying in the lines when coloring a picture makes me feel very proud of my self. It’s simple yes but being constantly bullied through out my childhood and even part of my adulthood has destroyed what coincidence I had. Being a little has helped build that back up somewhat. I also have a bad habit of grinding my teeth at night. Dental equipment to keep that from happening is to expensive. So I sleep with a pacifier and it doesn’t happen.
The part about littles not being able to say no is very wrong. Rule negotiation happens before entering little space. If something isn’t mutually agreed upon it doesn’t happen. Believe it or not the submissive in any form of bdsm has more power than the dom. If your dom ignores your wishes then get out fast. A good dom respects the subs boundaries unless otherwise stated in scene negotiation before hand. Hence the use of safewords.
In conclusion next time you want to complain about something. PLEASE for the love of sanity do your research first. This was funny to read but I also felt embarrassed on the writers behalf for how unresearched and hypocritical this was. Everyone in the world has something that someone else will find weird. Whether you admit it or not it’s true.
Thank you for your time, and to those in the United States have a happy independence day.
ABSOLUTELY! In addition to being a little, I am also: an extremely independent, confident, intellectual. I’m dominant in my daily life, successful in my career, and a high-marking MBA student headed towards upper management. I own my own home, and I own and can use more power tools than many men. I can cook gourmet meals, I can create beautiful art and I can take care of myself physically, emotionally, financially. Being a little for me is a chance to set aside much of that to allow myself to be taken care of and to experience the intimacy that that level of vulnerability brings. In no way am I ever unable to say no or be “controlled” in ways I don’t consent to. My relationship with my Daddy brings a level of closeness, vulnerability, and intimacy that vanilla people or even other kink people can only dream of. All of it is a choice. All of it is fulfilling deep, primal desires and needs within both of us. I would never set aside my Big side to anyone not worthy.
I am a “little” 25 years old and NO. Responsible practices do not include public its actually frowned upon for the reason other people can get triggered just like I wouldn’t go as slave or on a collar in public. Duh toxic people are in EVER COMMUNITY. IN ALL KINKS ARE THE BAD APPLES. The kink as a whole isn’t bad. Bad people on our kink appear worse than most because, yes they are worse. But that’s not the kink.
I use ddlg as a PTSD coping mechanism personally. I am not attracted to kids I dont think of them and the same goes for my daddy. He HATES PEDOS. I use it as therapy and have been old my consular it is healthy with safe words. No sometimes dosent mean no, BUT A SAFEWORD ALWAYS DOES. When i am little i forget about my daily stressors, have less panic attacks and have great sex and help get over severe childhood trauma will WELL talked out sessions, it evokes emotions that I can safely feel out and talk about after and learn to cope with in a safe space. Trigger warning when I was abused and raped I was told to not cry, I was told to not feel the way I was feeling. I like to sometimes relive feelings so I can cry , I can be babied and told its okay and talk out how I can better these bottled up emotions.
Some people engage in diaper play if not because babies , because they like the texture, or being degraded or they just have a pee fetish or it is a trigger for the little head space. There are SO many reasons people do each thing. For some it’s not sexual and just soothing, for some it’s highly sexual and has nothing to do with kids AT ALL. It’s a kink for adults playing a role. Period. The pedos who like it are, guess what, PEDOS WHO LIKE IT. and just because my kink triggers you dosent mean it dosent help someone else.
Just like sadism and masochism I know some people can bear to look at it because they have been physically abused. But it doesn’t mean it’s inherently wrong because some people use it to get over physical abuse they went through , so they can evoke feelings and feel them out in a safe space and take power of them or it just flat out turns them on. I’m a masochist, but dosent mean I want someone to come up and attack me, because that’s happened and I didnt “get off”. But if it consensually happens I would. Just like not everyone who is a sadist would attack random people for pleasure but THERE ARE THAT DO, dosent mean sadists are bad.
This post is one of the worst and unsourced things I’ve ever read, do some research and open your mind a bit before being a jackass and making people feel bad about themselves
I am a little. You would never know I don’t flaunt it around in public. I am well educated. I have a degree, I work a very high-paying and difficult job in the medical field. I am highly independent very well-off started from nothing. And let me tell you I have never once looked at a child like that. I have been with 3 fake daddies who ended up pedos and they are so incredibly different than responsible mentally stable daddies and mommies who are not attracted to the body of a child. There’s a huge difference between being attracted to the body of a child and the body of an adult regardless of the behaviors of the adult they are attracted to. I was in a relationship with a true pedophile and also done other horrible things I found this out and obviously made a police report. That being said he acted incredibly different, incredibly toxic and very sick in the mind, abusive and made me quite aware he was into kids because he wanted the real thing. He kept wanting me to look younger and younger physically. He had no care for the diapers, the headspace or anything he got with me when I was just shy of 17 and he was 25. As somebody who has experienced first- and a very dangerous Chronicle offending pedophile, I know ddlg is way different. It’s attraction to adults playing like a child, not children. Cut and dry. This post to someone who went through trauma of seeing what he did and my own rape experiences, is more triggering to me that ddlg ever could be. I respect that people are triggered, but they dont have to bash it just don’t engage in it.
As part of the ddlg and bdsm community, I feel very attacked. It’s never been about sexualizing children in any way, shape, or form. Shit, if anything it’s about emotional bonds, trust, nurturing, and caring. And if I do say so myself, by reading the one line, “from a brief TUMBLR search,” I can already tell you have to be some kind of degenerate, because who in their right mind goes onto any social media platform that isn’t tailored to anything about truly learning anything on ddlg, or bdsm and expects to think they’re right? Kink-shaming is the same as the as telling a dying person to suck it up and forget about it. Like, bitch, you ain’t any better than the shit that comes out of someones ass, and what makes you think you’re entitled to say your opinion? Honey, go and apologize to the trees that had to waste making oxygen for some little motherfucker. And if you even try to justify anything of what you wrote, I will beat you so hard that every one of your vertebrae pop out of your mouth like a fucking pez-dispenser.
Oh gawd! Hahaha! I laughed so freaking hard at this. This person’s done no research in this subject. Buddy buddy! Pinterest? Ha! I’m not even mad.
I cannot take this person seriously…you do know they use age regression therapeutically? Right? Oh wait…no you dont. You must have missed that like you missed the point… It shows.
No, I didn’t read the rest few paragraphs that explained to me that they were in fact just a repeat of the first two. Ugh, gfc.
From the amount of research ONLINE (as I’ve never met a person of the ddlg community), it appears to be a healthy exchange of power. The little is in control, yet relinquished control on all situations. Does that make sense? Educate don’t hate, people. Although it can be easier said than done, it can get you farther than the obvious bath salts this guys been snorting.
I don’t know everything, so correct me if I’m wrong. A little is not always submissive, and a caregiver isn’t always dominant, sometimes there are switches. It’s HIGHLY thought of as pedophilia, but any healthy dom/sub will tell you otherwise.
Safe, sane, consensual.
Let’s repeat that mantra three more times? Not trying to brain wash you…
From my understanding the relationship is about nurturing, caring, vulnerability, and trust. Trustttt. Did you miss that?
I’ve seen and read “freakier” stuff, buddy. Don’t kinkshame. The world doesn’t need anymore hate on frivolous ideas.
yes, there are toxic relationships built on fake doms, and manipulation, underage partners, and actual pedophiles. Learn the difference, because the world isn’t black and white.
I’ll have you know you sound extremely narrow minded and naive in my eyes, and that is a vulnerability to me. Not the healthy kind. Careful.
So before you become mad at something you cannot control, and something that is not yours to control let’s remember something:
Your open display of emotion can get you hurt.
Educate yourself before you jump to conclusions based off of a Pinterest meme.
What happens in someone’s relationship is sooooo none of your business, unless it is unhealthy, nonconsensual, abusive, and harmful-and such.
Likewise, know what your dealing with.
Crying on the internet won’t change a thing.:)
So when you were taught in kindergarten about the fact that people can dress now the hell they want, which part did you not understand(not black and white)?
You are going to die unhappy for sure if you keep worrying about other people’s problems…
I suggest a nice bubble bath, and Max and Ruby. :):);)
Worry about people like Jeffery Dahmer instead.
LITTLES DO GET A SAY! ESPECIALLY IN THE BEDROOM (SAFE WORD). RESEARCH IT! THERE IS SFW DDLG/ DDLB/ MDLG/ MDLB and NSFW relationships! THEY DON’T FLAUNT IT IN PUBLIC UNLESS IT’S 24/7 OR SFW! OKAY, IF YOU’RE AGAINST CGL, THEN YOU SHOULD BE AGAINST MASTER AND/ OR MISTRESS/ SLAVE RELATIONSHIPS! BECAUSE THEY APPARENTLY PROMOTE SLAVERY (THEY DON’T IT’S CONSENTUAL)!
thank you for bringing up the fact littles have a bigger say than any dom. we care for them with affection and love but when it involves NSFW littles have more control including the (SAFE WORD) and what there feeling for the time being.
I see a lot of opinions and no facts.
I see a lot of minors(@Kitty).
It isn’t hurting anybody leave it alone.
Honestly, I feel like your complete lack of understanding on the topic has been covered pretty well in comments. I just want to say how badly-written it is. Like, wow.I’m not sure of the pay structure on this site, but I really hope you’re an intern or otherwise working for free. This is bad, unsupported by any actual data. It’s just some weird person’s rant about a topic they chose not to research at all past what an acronym means. You should feel embarrassed for your terrible writing alone. Obviously, you should also feel ashamed for not bothering to do the slightest bit of research. But seriously, don’t quit your day job.
Rebecca, learn the difference between consenting ADULTS and children. Obviously, this confuses you.
It’s not hard to learn the differences, but you used a LOT of electrons to tell us you don’t get it, and that you do not respect other people.
And please stay away from children. I don’t want to read about your confusion causing you to do something inappropriate and/or illegal with a child.
The most disturbing point about this entire article is the author semi-acknowledges that DDlg involves two consenting ADULTS, then proceeds to demonstrate a confusion over who is and isn’t a legal adult vs a child.
I would seriously keep this author away from children. Too much risk the author will get confused again and do something inappropriate and/or illegal since they don’t seem to understand that boundary.
After a brief Tumblr search… LOL. Wow, you really worked hard on this writing assignment, didn’t you?
Do you put this little effort into everything? How do you keep a job?
Next time you buy a car, if you have one, please keep your car shopping to a brief Tumblr search and see how well that works.
I expected at least the lifting of a finger for an author of an article. You didn’t even do that much.
Plot Twist: Rebecca is a Little, and she’s just mad at her Daddy for not giving her a binky fast enough.
Ha !! Excellent lmbo ?
I am 15 yo and i am apart of this community for a couple years now. i’ve noticed that people do use this kink as a means to allow phedophilia but that isnt at all what its about. its about someone that needs a break from reality (sub) with someone whos willing enough to care for them (dom). even as a minor i can understand and see that this article is just like saying since were into BDSM we can just hit everyone we want. This community is honestly quite beautiful and the people i’ve met here are quite honest and good willed. most of the adults(18+) have warned us minors of the danger this may lead to. the ones this comunitty associates with are not the PHEDOPHILIC scum bags that walk the streets like everyone else. they deserve to be respected just like how you feel your opinion on the matter should be respected. dont use social media to kink shame a community of people you don’t fully understand. you may judge us off our personalities but not off this. i will judge you off your incompetence in the matter instead of judging you for the “midget porn” you watch… we are humans too not monsters… and for any doms out there who managed to read this please lend a hand. i need new ideas for me and my subs anniversary. anything is appreciated. sincerely @itzjuss_wes.
Well look at that, a literal child talking about how they’ve been welcomed into this “community” for years of their childhood.
That’s proof they’re pedophiles.
Uhm no. The community I’m in does not allow anyone under the age of 18 at events. But just because she’s 15 does not mean she’s not still a little. All of us always have been inside. Just because she’s 15 and a little does not mean she’s in a sexual DDlg relationship. Seriously stop projecting your own issues onto the rest of us you know absolutely nothing about
A literal child. They have literal children in these communities.
You are all pedophiles. That’s not projection, it’s fact. You can try to excuse it all you want, this child and other children she has mentioned are in this community. You are pedophiles.
Enjoy your ignorant over-generalization. “You are ALL pedophiles because one girl who is 15 and does not even indicate she’s in a sexual relationship claims to be part of ONE community.” My community would never and have never tolerated anyone underage because while MOST of our community are not sexual in their little space, it is all still closely tied to sexuality.
Anyone who makes broad, sweeping, over-generalizations IS projecting their own issues. You are looking for a reason to hate because of your prejudice against us that is born out of who knows what experience you had whether it was abuse, sexual repression, or what. But your inability and unwillingness to listen to those of us who are clearly highly intelligent and well-spoken and have neatly and nicely explained what the community as a whole is about and explained that yes there are unfortunate outliers who we do not consider part of our community just as you find outliers among EVERY group of people IS you projecting your issues onto us. Full stop. You can’t see it because you are blinded by your hate and disgust born from trauma or ignorance. I wish you well. But nothing you ever say behind the safety of your computer screen will never make me ashamed of who I am.
Go with love and grace.
Lady, the only problem is you. If you actually think that two adults playing roles is somehow related to an adult being sexually attracted to an actual child – seek help. Wait, can you tell the difference between pretend and reality? Cause if not, you’re the infantile, not littles.
Oh, and though this is totally not me, I DO love going on swings, cause it’s FUN. Wanna write a blog on how evil and dangerous I am?
Get a clue, or at least keep your cluelessness to yourself.
Yuck
i would like to address something. you ARE allowed to say no. that’s what a safe word is for. if the dom does not stop after the safe word is used, THAT is abuse.
If DDLG is pedo-lite, then BDSM is abuse-lite. And it isn’t. Do your research.
Sadly ignorance and discrimination don’t make for a good starting point of discussion. This article is inaccurate, judgmental trash that blindly projects personal opinion onto a way of life the author CLEARLY has NO understanding of. Honestly, it belongs in the little corner of the internet where it gets lost forever. I feel sorry for anyone in a relationship with this person and even more so that there are people this fucking stupid on the planet.
Soft/Daddy fom here. God, I want to thank everyone who added their intellectual responses here. Something happened recently and I was utterly disgusted with myself to the point of wanting to harm myself as a punishment, I wasn’t expecting to find anything here that would have helped me. A handful of comments here that reminder me why exactly I like to this— it’s the vulnerability that my partner/little shows, to think he is vulnerable around him. There are some godawful comments downright shitting on emotional vulnerability and lacks empathy and I’m so glad someone had replied. Ironically they also opened my eyes to the kind of dumb people’s judgment I’m dealing with.
nope.
I already knew this was going to be wildly incorrect when you started with “Recently” and I saw the year was 2018. ? WHAT. You clearly know absolutely nothing about this.
I feel like commiting suicide seeing this because of what I have been through, I was forced into ABDL/CGL/DDLG/AGEPLAY at a young age and it makes me feel so sicken and seeing all of the comments are defenders who know they are wrong make me want to beat them to a pulp. Do you know what’s wrong with this kink/fetish and yet you defend it. This is why BDSM is not allowing you in their property/area.Read the room bitch.
This is wrong this is ribby wrong and you you all are defending this shame on all of you I hope you all burned in hell.If you want to duke it out with me
4faithnjoku@gmail.com or 2405812107 is the way to go.
Jokes on you, being kinkshamed is unironically my kink. I love it.
As a teen to preteen little. I have a few things to say. Yes this article is old but just gotta say! I am a child rape survivor! I was very young when it happened, and my little age is NOT the age it happened. DO I have daddy issues?, yes I do as I was abused by my father. But that has nothing to do with my little space or age. My daddy before I lost him, he passed away was not into children or anyway desirous of children! He was my rock, my defender and protector. He helped me take care of myself, when I could not! The rules where for my well being and betterment. My little space allows me to be free of the pain and despair I suffer due to the abuse! The feelings of worthlessness and blame that I have felt thru out my life. Feelings that almost caused my DEATH by suicide. Daddy allowed me a safe haven free of judgement and ridicule the world gives victims of abuse. Because abuse victims even children get judged, like they asked for it or wanted it. Wake up and pull your head out of your backside. You are a extremely repressed and closed minded person that has no idea of personal well being. I am a little and not afraid of stating it. Do I force people to accept it?, no I do not. Most do not even know it. Hell, if an adult woman calls a man daddy in a sexy manner you do not automatically think pedo, you think it is sexy. So that being said does that make you a pedo? Hmmmm just some food for thought. So I say to the negative, uninformed, and just plan haters need to stay in their lane and DD/lg people will stay in ours. Hate on yourself for your truely uninformed blather and leave us be!
Oh and if it was not clearly stated, I am a consenting adult. My true age is Noone’s business, but I am over the age of 40!
This breathless misrepresentation of DD/lg is as absurd as calling “Sir/pet” BDSM an imitation of literal beastiality… or that spanking, paddles and floggers are literal assault and battery … or that bondage sex is imitation of literal false imprisonment and rape … or that “Master/slave” is imitation of literal sex trafficking and racist forced labor … or that MedFet is literally practicing medicine without a license and glorifying sexually violent medical malpractice… or that cunnilingus or fellatio with male- or female- cum swallowing is LITERALLY CANNIBALISM.
Oh my effing word.
You know why so many people are into this DDlg kink?
Because we live in a culture of morally panicked outrage which shamed them at a young age when they began to sexually mature, and treated the idea of the mere existence of their nascent sexuality as the most monstrous, unspeakable evil — an evil **which they manifested within themselves at a criminally inappropriate (but biologically necessary) age.**
For Shame! Oh the depraved deviance of gradually growing up — while not yet being fully grown up!
Yeah, you bet that’s gonna leave a mark on someone’s psychosexuality that they’re gonna need a healthy, consensual, safe, and accepting outlet for later-on in *ADULTHOOD.* As in: when they can’t emotionally fully connect with a sexual partner via vanilla sex … because the continuity of their early sexual self had been fractured and shamed into abandonment; drowned in enough violent rhetoric and guilt to make them grow into sexually dissociative adults.
Why does it not occur to these outrage fetishists that maybe — JUST MAYBE— these folks into DDlg underwent a kind of psychological sexual abuse akin to deprivation of developmental necessities just like physical safety, attention, affection, nutrition, or mental and physical excerise? Blaming the people reclaiming their own sexuality from this all-pervasive environment of condemnation toward healthy, normal, incremental human sexual developement is LITERALLY gaslighting and victim-blaming.
What’s next? Should we all stop breastfeeding infants because nipples are an erogenous zone and can lead to an unexpected state of arousal and potentially even an orgasm during nursing? The shock! The horror! To think that nature would have the audacity to use the same rush of neurochemicals for maternal-bonding as it does for sexual partner bonding and species reproduction.
Get over yourself. Literally every kind of sex is weird and messy and disgusting in some way if you choose to look at it through a lens of demonization and drown it in the paint of moral indignation.
You know what’s perverse? This cultural attitude toward any and all sexuality as though it were unequivocally inherently sinful — that sexuality necessarily corrupts some fantasized notion of blank-slate innocence — and is only allowed to do so at the stroke of midnight on one’s 18th birthday, when people are expected to magically jump from pure-innocence child to completely-arrived adult, bypassing any despicably unthinkable developmental years in between.
As someone that is new to all this, I see this as any part of the whole BDSM kink or DOM/SUB kink. I would never do it in public but I have see regular Doms and Subs in public subjecting there Sub to punishment in public, in NYC I saw a Dom get mad at there Sub cause she wasn’t paying attention bumped into him and ketchup and mustard fell on his shoes and he made her lick it off in front of us all waiting for a subway and my 4 year old daughter even saw along with all the other kids waiting for the subway with their parents.
My experience it doesn’t matter what the kink is there is always some idiot that takes it too far and exposes it to the public, especially around the view of children. Like I don’t go around performing acts of PDAs (Public Displays of Affections) so I have the same issue with a
Same Sex and heterosexual idiots acting like it is totally fine to be doing more than a simple peck kiss in public. Just keep your crap out the public sphere and I do not see any issue with and of your legal fantasies with a consenting adult. Hey by your logic rough sex should never happen as it is kind of rape looking, can you imagine being called sick, deranged, to do that to another human being consenting or not.
This is my view as someone learning since I married a submissive wife.