By Sebastian Roman
- Lasagne
In addition to being impossible to spell, why does it have so many layers? Why does it need so many layers? It’s clearly hiding something, but what is it? The fact that this pasta is so mysterious and obscure makes it unsettling.
- Mac & Cheese
Who is Mac, and why would you want to eat him and his cheese? And why are they never separate, why is it never Mac OR cheese? It’s pretty self explanatory why this one is disturbing.
- Ravioli
This pasta just looks like a condom, and nobody wants to eat a condom.
- Angel Hair
So hair in food is gross, but angel hair isn’t? Give me a break. When I’m eating pasta, the last thing I want to think about is hair, but some people are into that I guess.
- Elbow
This one is named after and looks like a human body part. Only a cannibal would eat this. If a pasta is going to be shaped like a human body part, then at least make it something that’s supposed to be eaten, like ass.