By Mike Pence
What ever happened to the great American culture of traditionalism? Today we live in a society where gay marriage is celebrated and encouraged, but straight millennials are openly discouraged by Hollywood and media to not marry or have children because of climate change or something. We celebrate traditional gender roles only when they are performed by the opposite sex or a trans person. We idolize the worst kinds of people in pop culture. Whether it be rapper XXXTentacion, who had the number two album in the country and is a literal ex-convict who served jail time for robbery at gunpoint and is now being prosecuted for beating the shit out of his pregnant girlfriend, or Cardi B, who had the number one song in the country and used to be a stripper and a member of the Bloods gang. It is widely known and accepted that Hollywood is rampant with perverts who manipulate and force aspiring actors and actresses into complying with their sexual deviancy in exchange for the limelight. Yet, these people just get a pass, because who cares about morals anymore amirite?
It used to be the case that men and women recognized their differences and talents. Men would pursue a career while women would pursue raising children, and they were happy to do so. In the 1970’s, American women reported a much higher overall life satisfaction than men. But since then, women’s’ happiness score has fell below that of men. It was the expected norm for men and women to look forward to marriage. But today, the percentage of Americans who are married is at its lowest point since 1920. The median age for marriage went from 20 for women in 1960 to 27 for women today and from 23 for men in 1960 to 29 today. According to Pew Research Center, one in four millennials will likely never get married, even though 70% of millennials expressed a desire to get married. So what gives?
It is pretty obvious that marriage does not have the same social capital as before. A 2014 Pew Research Center survey found that when respondents who were asked about the value of marriage for society, 50% said that society would be just as well off if people had priorities other than marriage. Marriage does not have the same incentives as it used to. Back then, people waited until marriage to move in together and have sex. Since 1990, there has been a 138% increase in couples living together, even though on average couples who live together before marriage have a 33% higher divorce rate than those who waited until after marriage to live together. Only 3% of Americans wait until marriage to have sex, and have the lowest divorce rates compared to those who did not wait. Even before the 1960’s, this figure was quite low at just 11%. The Institute for Family Studies found that women who were virgins until their wedding night had a 5% chance of getting divorced. That figure goes up to 22% with one sexual partner before marriage. When a woman has ten or more sexual partners before marriage, her marriage has a 33% chance of ending in divorce within the first five years. It is no wonder why over 52% of marriages end in divorce.
But why should we care? So what if relationships don’t always work out? Because marriages that end in failure cause significant damage not only to the two people involved, but especially if kids are in the picture. No fault divorce occurs when no wrongdoing is shown by either party, and either party can request a divorce without any evidence of breach of the marital contract. This means judges can award alimony and custody without any evidence or fault, and allows a spouse to forcibly divorce their partner. Up to 80% of divorces are unilateral and have served to separate a high percentage of children from their fathers. The divorce courts are systematically biased against fathers and almost always award custody to the mother while making the father pay thousands of dollars in child support, regardless of whether or not the mother is using the money for her child. Not only is divorce harmful for fathers, but it is also taxing for the women who become single mothers. When children lack parental guidance growing up because their father is out of the picture and their mother is constantly working to make ends meet, they end up finding solace in dangerous activities. In fact, 85% of imprisoned youth grew up without fathers. Even President Obama has acknowledged that “children who grow up without a father are five times more likely to live in poverty and commit crime, nine times more likely to drop out of schools and 20 times more likely to end up in prison.”
With all that being said, why shouldn’t we try harder as a society to bring back some standards for both men and women to be good spouses and parents in the end? It is safe to say that most people want to become married and stay married, and when certain premarital behaviors are guaranteed to end in higher divorce rates, why shouldn’t we try and avoid them? Instead, we try to move as far away from traditional gender roles as possible, rather than acknowledging that they do have some merit. This is not to say we need to go back to the 1950s and prevent women from entering the workforce. But perhaps we could tell men and women that a life of endless hedonism and not worrying about the consequences that your actions will have tomorrow is not the way to go. Maybe we can stop buying the movies and albums of sexual predators and ex-convicts and demand some standards to be set in place. Or we can continue heading down this path of unending degeneracy and keep wondering why we’re so unhappy.
Sources:
https://www.bet.com/music/2017/09/08/xxxtentacion-domestic-violence-case.html
http://www.pewresearch.org/topics/marriage-and-divorce/
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17236611
https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nvsr/nvsr53/nvsr53_20.pdf
http://www.bentley.edu/impact/articles/nowuknow-why-millennials-refuse-get-married
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