By Michael Ford Friends, no need to lick our wounds.The right won, by right I mean a double entendre: right-leaning, conservative patriots as well as right vs. wrong.Here’s why the right won: Because the media lost; their bias has been unquestionably exposed. Because pollsters lost; even Dems are shaking their heads in wonder as to what happened. Because Trump got 72 million votes; that’s unheard of for a (presumably) defeated candidate. Because Trump did not…
A Winter Reading List
By Harold Rook Hey, you there! Yeah, you! Do you spend all your time gaming and watching movies? Do you hate hearing from different perspectives? Do you hardly ever read? Well, then you better get ready, because I’m about to introduce something that will blow your mind! Introducing: reading! Something nobody ever really seems to do anymore! In all seriousness, however, it does seem like there aren’t that many people that are reading books for…
How to Have the Biggest Brain
By Patrick McAuliffe The cooperative online game Among Us took the world by storm a few months ago, effectively killing off Fall Guys and cementing its place as the latest virtual COVID-era obsession. Everyone from PewDiePie to Alpharad to even AOC has played and streamed it, and the servers are still packed to this day. I am by no means the best Among Us player, but I hope to share some big-brain tips and tricks…
A Federalist Solution
By Joe Badalamenti The past four years have been a wild ride, to say the least. While the current election has produced many uncertainties, one thing which I can say for certain is that the American people are divided. This polarization did not come out of nowhere; it has been growing in the last decade and amplified by multiple bad actors, such as politicians and the mainstream media. If not checked properly, this growing polarization…
The Greatest Arbiter of Human Rights!
By Murder O. Crows Hear ye, hear ye! Today, we, the most legitimate and fair council of the United Nations, begin the legal proceedings regarding none other than the greatest dictatorial power to ever walk the face of the Earth: The United States! Yes, the United States, that great world policeman whose feats of bringing about freedoms and democracy across the globe have come at a cost. Such a cost, in fact, that it’s time…
Farewell
By Tommy Gagliano On March 18, 2017, I announced what college I would be attending the following August on Instagram, stating “Officially going to Binghamton I guess. Meh.” I was obviously very enthusiastic and excited to be a Bearcat. Sarcasm aside, I wanted to go to the real BU—Boston University—and I felt that being relegated to Binghamton with a 1520 SAT score was insulting. As a straight white male, applicants that checked off one or…
Public Enemies No. 45
By Patrick McAuliffe We’re almost through the madness that is 2020. The presidential election has come and gone, and while Trump will have his day(s) in court to dispute the results, Joe Biden is most likely cemented as the incoming 46th US President. All signs point to a messy transition, and we will need to see how Biden plans to govern America. Hopefully, his tweets about “coming for” gun manufacturers and national mask mandates are…
The Death of Alex Trebek is the Last Straw
By Laura DeLuca On the morning of November 8th, we lost a legend. An iconographic symbol of American television game shows. Arguably the best game show host in history. A bold statement, but I’d make a case for it. He was the most intelligible and quick-witted eighty-year-old man that I had ever come across. He had all of his marbles, which is more than what most people have. Especially at that age. Yes, it’s true—we…
Queer-Coding Villains: Homophobic Undertones in Stephen King Novels
By Madeline Perez Stephen King. I’m sure you’ve heard of him. Many of you have seen movies inspired by his novels. The quirkiest of you have maybe even read his books. For decades, our culture has happily lapped up Stephen King’s material like a stereotypical kitten does heavy cream, and we love it. American pop culture simply can’t get enough of the bloody horror, chilling tension, and humiliations of being a pre-teen that are just…
Gaming Consoles: The Next Generation
By Dillon O’Toole Pre-orders: the final barrier. These are the hurdles of the quarantine gamers. Their mission—to find a new gaming console; to seek out new games and developers; to boldly go where no console gamer has gone before. Besides being an excuse to ripoff the Star Trek opening monologue, this article was written to remind anyone who may have forgotten that November’s cold winds bring with them the release of the Playstation 5 and…
One-Trick Tenney and NY-22’s Other Candidates
By Patrick McAuliffe Binghamton students may not care much for local politics. As seems to be the trend in college-dominated towns, students come for four years to get their education, widely-available booze, and socialization with people their own age before heading out into the world for better opportunities. However, should you, dear reader, care to know how our Congressional district’s candidates stand on current issues beyond the D, R, or L next to their name,…
Six Reasons Why Slender Man is Sexy as Fuck
By Sara Traynor Have you ever looked at Slender Man and thought, “Wow, that’s the most beautiful creature I’ve ever laid eyes on, I wish that someone would write a list with 6 reasons detailing exactly why he’s sexy?” If the answer is yes, you’ve come to the right place. If the answer is no, it better only be because you’d prefer an infinite list. Even if you don’t think he’s sexy (which I guess…
Who Are We Voting For?
Binghamton Review is nonpartisan—as an organization, we do not support or endorse any particular parties or candidates. As individuals, however, our staff certainly have opinions. Here are the endorsements for President of the United States from nine staff members that felt comfortable sharing. Tommy Gagliano – Jo Jorgensen Best policies, mentally stable, and no sexual assault allegations? Sign me up. It also helps that Jorgensen is the most strategic option for New Yorkers who oppose…
Top Halloween Costumes for 2020
By Our Staff NBA Player: Now more affordable than ever! Just buy a generic jersey and slap “Black Lives Matter” on the nameplate and BAM! You could be half of the league. Coronavirus: The perfect costume for frat guys that like entering people’s bodies without consent. Slutty Police Officer: With this trendy costume, both your looks and your knees will make people have to catch their breath! Karen: If you are going to report every…
Get to Know Tom Quiter, Libertarian Candidate for State Senate
By Harold Rook The following is an abbreviated transcription of an interview conducted over Zoom on October 14th, 2020. Harold Rook: “Tell us a little about yourself.” Tom Quiter: “I was born a farm boy, always lived on some kind of farm. If we weren’t farming for business, we were farming for ourselves. Putting away our own food saved [us] a lot of money [and] allowed us to bring the house up to par… farming…