By Our Staff Pro: The porcelain throne is no throne, but in fact an electric chair, and we are all its victims. What Big Toilet has been espousing since the beginning of modern plumbing has been a disaster for the human race. Why, you ask? We have been convinced that the at-least 330 million toilets in the homes of the American public (one for every person) are “necessary” and “sanitary.” But let’s be honest: the…
An Interview with Logan Blakeslee, SA Presidential Hopeful
By Arthur O’Sullivan If you thought election season was over, think again! In November, we voted for a bunch of politicians in far away places. This coming Sunday, we’ll be voting for our Student Association members. Unlike high school, this student government has the opportunity to influence campus life for everyone: cutting or increasing student costs, aiding or protesting administrative abuses, fighting for or against student interests. It all depends on who gets elected. To…
I’m Running for S.A. President to Abolish Parking Services
By Logan Blakeslee Binghamton University Parking Services sits somewhere at the intersection of greed and incompetence. Besides Sodexo, there is no presence on campus that is more universally reviled than Parking Services, and for good reason. Its policies have become more draconian over time and are deliberately designed to extract as much money from students as possible. I decided that enough was enough after hearing several dozen stories about unfair ticketing or the absurd inconsistencies…
The Walls are Closing In
By Madeline Perez “Making your way in the world today takes everything you got,” or so says the hit theme from the ‘80s sitcom “Cheers.” This statement rings true for many, and probably goes double for you starving, broke college students. But I’m here to ask: Does it? Does making your way (in the world today) truly “take everything you [sic] got?” And what happens if you’ve given “everything you got” and, due to isolative…
I Fell in Love with a SEX ROBOT??? (clickbait)
By Madeline Perez The year was 2016. As I found myself preoccupied with schoolbooks and the weight of being a misunderstood hot-topic-themed teen genius, my friends were also preoccupied with what I would call lesser trivialities—namely, a new mobile game called Mystic Messenger. Yes, the very one and same South Korean dating simulation game. Opting to take one last shot at conformity, I was peer pressured into downloading it, and for the next few weeks…
Creationism in America: Faith turned Fanatical
By Logan Blakeslee I have a confession to make: I am obsessed with Young Earth Creationism. It all started in late June 2018, when I met Baptist preacher and repeat criminal Kent Hovind at a Christian summer camp here in Broome County. The event changed the way I thought about science, evolution, and religion, but not in the way you might expect. Before I get ahead of myself, let me divulge a bit more about…
AI, the Scourge of Humanity?
By Joe Badalamenti In the past century, technological advancement has been growing at an exponential rate. Artificial Intelligence (or AI), a specific application of computing technology, has been developed to complete increasingly complex tasks: DallE has the ability to generate unique and detailed paintings; ChatGPT has the ability to create essays, code slices, and other complex compositions, all the while newer, more advanced AI programs are being developed each day. Will Artificial Intelligence programs reach…
The Best Music of 2022
By Dillon O’Toole Well, the end of yet another year is fast approaching. That means only one thing: I get to talk about what great music came out this year! As always, this article (that’s totally not a list expanded into paragraphs) will be heavily biased as I won’t be considering anything that I haven’t listened to. So, if you read this and you don’t see one of your favorites on here, I probably just…
I Don’t Care about Your Spotify Wrapped
By Our Staff I’ve spent the last twelve months plotting my revenge. Last year I got endlessly bullied for my “cringe” Spotify Wrapped. At 100 Gecs they winced; at Three Doors Down they gaffed; at Maroon 5 they chortled. Ever since, I’ve had nothing in the gleam of my eye besides violent overthrow. Everyday I curated my tastes to the highest degree of refined culture; over one hundred years of recorded music at my fingertips.…
An Interview with Rakefet Abergel
By Matilde Steck Rakefet Abergel is a California-based Israeli actor, director, producer, and screenwriter. She has had roles in major films, but in the last five years has risen as an extraordinary talent in horror filmmaking, with two notable recent films being Jax in Love and Boo. Can you explain, in your own words, who you are as a filmmaker? Rakefet began in cinema as an actress but moved into directing and especially writing to…
The Jon Lizak Incident
By Logan Blakeslee, Sean Harrigan, and Arthur O’Sullivan The United States of America experienced an unprecedented event on January 6, 2021: A sitting president refused to concede his electoral loss, believing that the vote had been stolen through massive voting fraud. That day, nearly 12,000 ardent supporters of Donald Trump gathered at the U.S. Capitol Building for a “Stop the Steal” protest, in a last-ditch effort to pressure republican senators and vice president Mike Pence…
Marijuana Inflation at Binghamton University
By Siddharth Gundapenini In the United States, inflation accounting serves an ever more important role. The Bureau of Labor Statistics, Bureau of Economic Analysis, and numerous private firms all calculate different measures of inflation, all with the same general purpose of allowing macroeconomic researchers to understand how much prices are rising, what specific goods/services are gaining popularity, and where these changes are taking place. Unfortunately, this analysis remains confined to goods and services sold legally.…
ABCs of Binghamton 2022
Advice Column: Do you need help with your problems? Well you’re in luck because we won’t provide any practical solutions. Bitches: What you won’t be getting this semester. COVID: This is most definitely over and we definitely aren’t seeing an uprise in cases already. I sure love to not hear professors complain about it over and over and over and over and over. Dunkin’: Every afternoon, a wriggling, writhing mass of humanity manifests to block…
Next Year’s E-Board
By Our Staff Arthur: Arthur “A-Dog” O’Sullivan is a sophomore Biology/Classics double major. He enjoys writing articles on center-right politics, art, and holiday-themed fiction. He needs a girlfriend. Madeline: Howdy, faithful Bing Review readers! I, Madeline Perez, am back for yet another wildly successful year on the E-board. While it was a great honor being Managing Editor, in order to fulfill my lifelong dream of running a dictatorship, I knew I had to brutally murder…
Why You Should Read P.J. O’Rourke
By Arthur O’Sullivan A few days ago, the world learned that the renowned libertarian-conservative humorist P.J. O’Rourke died of lung cancer at age 74. If you are reading this, chances are high that you are a student who has only heard the name recently, if at all. His most famous work is from the 1990s, where he would lambast the politics of the day, famously quipping, “The Democrats are the party that says government will…